if only time could just turn back // dashiell

[abraxas scorpius malfoy]

Abraxas couldn't believe that just days after thinking that he wouldn't need to worry anymore, something had happened that required more worry than he'd ever experienced before. Everything had seemed so effortless and perfect after he and Dashiell had started speaking again and found themselves move past the former barriers of their friendship. Though only his sisters were aware that there was anything going on between the two of them, rendering them unable to express it in public without revealing everything they were keeping a secret, it kept a practically constant smile on his face to know that after everything that had happened between them since the beginning of their fifth year, Dash was there for him in every way he could wish him to be.

Then his mother had gone missing. While he'd naturally been alarmed to hear of what had happened to Professor Dalton, Abraxas had been delighted to see his mother rise to the top of the school, despite the fact that she could probably have done so at any time if she'd wanted to and had only done so at the start of the year as she had been concerned for the safety of the students. This reason should have brought out his worrisome side but he had failed to realise that Hermione may have just put herself into a dangerous position. Now that she was nowhere to be seen, he was kicking himself for having not looked into it with the same paranoia, that would have in this situation proved helpful, as he did most other things.

It was now November and he hadn't heard a word from his mother for two weeks. It was completely unlike her to just disappear with no warning and with the news of her predecessor still clear in his memory, Brax naturally feared what had become of her. Someone was clearly targeting their headteachers and if their first victim had been separated from her soul, what would be left of the woman he cared for so deeply when they found her, if they ever did? His father was completely lost and exhausting every contact he knew to try and track down his wife and the mother of his three children. Abraxas wished he could have stayed strong about it all but as soon as he'd seen Jaslene after hearing that nobody knew where she was, he'd simply broken down in her arms.

With Louis searching the castle to get help from Dominique on his Charms essay, Goldstein and Thomas chasing girls around the grounds and Dashiell who knew where, Abraxas was alone in the boys' dormitory with little more to do than think. Was his mother safe? Would his father be able to find her? How long would it be before Professor Styx was attacked? Would the newly returned founders really be able to help, as they had promised everyone they would do? And what about himself? On top of everything else, he had to get through lessons and try not to fail his OWLs at the end of the year. Would she be back by then? It wouldn't take that long to find her, right? There were only so many places she could possibly be and with every wizard and witch in the country aware that she was missing, she'd surely be back with them in time for Christmas.

The creak of the door revealed the face of the boy who had proved to be his rock throughout anything that had happened over the past four years. He needed him now more than ever and now that he was, he supposed, his boyfriend, he could surely count on him to stand by his side as he had always done before. Abraxas smiled weakly from where he sat on his bed and followed it with a meager "Hey." At least at the end of it all, he still had Dashiell.

[dashiell jameson peakes]

Dashiell didn't realise when he woke up that morning that news was beginning to spread through Hogwarts. Of course, he wasn't completely blind to the changes that were tearing through Hogwarts in a deathly torrent. First of all and perhaps the most controversial was the announcement of Hogwarts's Founders' return. Dashiell was confused. They were old, and the idea of the old, dead just randomly finding their way back into his world worried him. If the founders could magic their way back into life and power, who else could? The idea of Voldemort or Grindelwald regaining the world for another run was terrifying. Get the two together, and who knows what would happen.

Yet, the world wasn't satisfied with the turmoil that was erupting. It needed more, and so the tectonic plates in the crust of the complacent were active, scraping and forcing their way upon one another. With the installation of a new Headmaster, the third for the year, counting the first woman who'd been found at the demise of the Dementors, questions were beginning to be raised. After all, where did the Headmistress go? It was almost as if the woman had thrown an invisibility cloak over herself and vanished from the face of the wizarding world itself. At the beginning, Dashiell thought that she may have had some other obligations. He didn't like to push Abraxas for information, because it made him feel like he were using his fellow Gryffindor as a gossipy insider source. If Abraxas felt like sharing anything, Dashiell trusted that he would be told.

Dashiell had been walking through the Courtyards, talking to a girl from Hufflepuff about the Charms assignment he'd forgotten about (for instead of practicing the spells as he was supposed to do, he'd decided that imaging duels between the various professors at Hogwarts to be more interesting), when he'd first been approached by another student about the missing Headmistress. The boy who'd interrupted his inquiry to the Hufflepuff was from Ravenclaw, but at least a year older than Dash. He'd pulled Dash off to the side with an authoritarian grimace on his face. The pursuit of knowledge apparently included being a little bit of a weasel. After being assured that Dashiell knew nothing, he turned on his heel and sped off. The Hufflepuff girl had left by that time, impatient. Once again going to be at the mercy of the Charms Professor, Dash made his way up the stairs. Once again he'd been stopped by another student with an inquiry as to what Brax had told him about his mother's disappearance.

Dashiell was annoyed at this time, and snapped at the student, asking why everyone thought that he would know anything about Hermione Malfoy or whether or not she would be returning anytime soon. This student took Dash into a side-corridor and spoke in hushed tones. “Don't be surprised if she's lying in a hidden chamber in the castle, soul sucked dry. There's something that has it out for the head of this school. Next, we'll find Professor Styx's body dangling from a turret, I promise you.” Dashiell made an angry retort about the student being the only body found dangling from a turret before rushing his way to the towers, not halting for anyone he passed. He may have heard Davies say his name, but his mind wasn't in a place to take the time to pause and look back as he climbed his way through a family of dark-eyed, fair-skinned girls clamoring about Wizarding Cards.

“Hey.” Dashiell said, trying to figure out the tone of voice that Abraxas was using. It clearly wasn't the excited “hey” that he might have used if they were meeting before a game of Quidditch. It seemed to be flat, and somewhat listless. Naturally this worried the beater. He wasn't always the gentlest, the most sensitive young man, and Dashiell felt limited in his ability to console Abraxas fully. So, he would do his best, nonetheless, grasping at relationship straws, so to speak. Instead of sitting down on his own bed, to have this conversation with Abraxas, Dashiell sidled his way onto his secret boyfriend's bed until he was hip-to-hip.

“What's on your mind?” The question was rhetorical, but he thought it might help Abraxas to rip open the wound and face it for what it was, instead of letting it haunt the back of his mind. Dashiell knew it would hurt, and the idea of his own mother vanishing without a trace sent his stomach falling. Dash knew that Abraxas let everything fall upon his own shoulders, even in cases like this. Couple that guilty feeling with the physical symptoms of worry and a painful combination was made.

Dash laid a warm hand across Abraxas's back as he pulled the blonde against him.

[abraxas scorpius malfoy]

The only issue that came anywhere close to his missing mother was that people insisted upon questioning him about it. He was sure that Jas and Cassie were receiving the same treatment but it seemed as if everyone in the castle was itching to know what had become of their Headmistress of a month and a half. Hell, Brax was itching to find out if she was okay. A fair portion of these interrogators had genuinely good intentions and just wanted to make sure that both Hermione and her family were all okay but the majority seemed to just want the gossip. He could tell the difference between the two by their facial expression when he told them he knew nothing - the fair portion looked pained for him and the majority looked disappointed. Needless to say, he preferred the fair portion but merely as the lesser of two evils. He just wanted to wrap himself up in his bedsheets, ignore everybody and close his eyes until his mother was there tell him she was okay. Even Slytherins had been quizzing him and this led him to believe that his older sisters had been more successful in warding off the unwanted attention. Unfortunately it didn't stop with them. Brax was sure that his friends, and indeed those of his sisters, were being interviewed in the hope that information may have been disclosed to them. As much as he'd love to be able to tell Dashiell and the others where she was, he simply didn't know.

Would it get easier with time or harder? He missed her more every day as the gap between now and when he'd last seen her grew. Would there come a point when he was able to carry on as normal, as people were usually eventually able to do after losing a loved one, or would he be constantly worrying about her? Abraxas held on to the blind hope that whoever had taken her, because she must surely have been abducted, had done so to send a message and if they had killed her then it would have been made public. The fact that nobody knew where she was had to be a sign that she was still alive, right? As much as it pained him to imagine her being tortured, it had to be better than being dead or was that just selfish? At least she would be able to recover, even if that required an Obliviator to put it behind her. Until he saw her pale face on the cover of the Daily Prophet, he would survive on the idea that her heart was still beating and there was thus still a chance of her coming back to him.

Dashiell's arrival in the dormitory was extremely welcomed. Though the pressures of his current life were still pushing down on him, the appearance of his friend lifted them slightly as if he were helping him take the weight. Feeling him by his side was almost as comforting as his mother's embrace and for now it was the closest he'd get. Another weak smile formed on his face as he was pulled up against him, prompting Abraxas to slide an arm of his own around Dash's waist. "She'll be fine, won't she? She helped defeat You-Know-Who," he said, knowing that no explanation of who he was referring to would be needed. Though he'd already formulated this conclusion, he didn't wholly believe it. He needed to hear it from someone else and there was nobody he trusted more than his best friend. Of course, nobody would have expected Professor Dalton to be in danger either. She'd been a brilliant witch and yet she'd fallen victim to a Dementor in her own office. She could cast a patronus with ease - Brax had seen the reindeer at the beginning of every Christmas feast since his first year. If his mother still had her wand then she stood a fair chance but without it he had no hope. There was a slim chance that she'd learned to perform magic without a wand but as he'd never seen her do so, it was little more than a fantasy.

"But don't let me be a moodkill, how are you?" he asked, forcing a more convincing smile. In some ways it was easier to put on a brave face with Dash's support but it was also harder to persuade him it was genuine simply because he knew him so well.